The Question
Enthusiastic Enrico who wants that junkie in some MILF trunkie: “Hey Frankie. How do I get laid at MilfAddicts.com?”
Me: “MilfAddicts.com? Almost too easy. You just have to get into the mom mindset. Become what you desire. That’s some kung-fu zen shit right there, hey? Anyhoo… If you wanna skaboom the moms, you gotta know what makes the moms tick. First thing? Go get yourself some mom jeans. Now, put ’em on. No, I’m not kidding. Hike those bad boys way up. Be proud of them pleats. Next, go get some curlers for your hair. You know what’s coming. That’s right. Put ‘em in. Tie ‘em all up in your flowing tresses. For you bald dudes out there, no hair? No problem. Tape that shit to your scalp. Perfect. Now that you’re all decked out in your mom jeans and curlers, and you’re beginning to understand the mom mindset, you fucking don’t!”
What I’m saying is, you could be the MILF whisperer and you still wouldn’t be getting any sweet MILF action at MilfAddicts.com.
But why, Frankie? What’s wrong with MilfAddicts.com?
Oh, just the usual trio of bullshit:
Fake members. Tsk.
Fake profiles. Tsk.
Fake emails. Tsk.
Three things a mom would definitely shake her disappointment finger at.
Tell me more, Frankie.
Certainly.
“Fantasy Cuties”.
That’s what you’ll find at MilfAddicts. A fuckload of “Fantasy Cuties”.
That sounds like a good thing, doesn’t it?
If fake women are your thing, then I guess so.
Otherwise, no. Definitely not.
But I want details!
So, umm, how about some details?
As always, we’re going to head on over to the terms and conditions page to find what we’re looking for.
Why the terms page?
Because the terms page contains the truth, good or bad, about what is happening on a dating site.
See, the terms and conditions page is where all the rules and stipulations of the site are located. Simply by using their site, you agree with all the terms that are laid out on that page. Fair enough. Except that in all that legal mumbo-jumbo is where less-than-scrupulous dating sites like to bury their bullshit. If they’re going to try and pull a fast one on you, the terms are where you can find that out before actually joining their site.
How about we look for an example instead of me continuing to blather on about it?
And boom. The search is short. Some highlights (lowlights?) from Section 4:
4. FOR AMUSEMENT PURPOSES ONLY
I’ve said it before, this is not what you wanna see. Seriously, you’re not signing up to a dating site to be “amused”.
A little more of the same coming up…
4.B. You comprehend, acknowledge, and accept that our Service, presented in the style of an online dating service, is an entertainment service. All content is provided for the entertainment and amusement of You.
Great. Thanks guyz!
“Cutie” time.
4.C. THIS SITE UTILIZES FANTASY PROFILES IDENTIFIED AS FANTASY CUTIES. You comprehend, acknowledge, and accept that some of the profiles listed on the Site may be operated by our Site or third party contractors and are fictitious.
Fan-fucking-tastic!
And one more bit just because…
4.C.1. Interactions originating from Fantasy Cuties functionality could be computer generated or could be created by the Site or third party contractors hired by the Site.
Can you pick up what I’m putting down here? Of course you can. Your mama didn’t raise no dummy!
Of course, there’s more bullshit to behold. There always is. You wanna be “amused”? Go on ahead and read the rest of the horror show contained in MilfAddicts’s terms. I’m using “amused” in the loosest sense of the definition, by the way. I’ve had enough though. One can only gag on this nonsense for so long.
I don’t believe you, Frankie!
Umm…
Just sayin’.
Look, it’s good to have your own opinion. Just not when, you know, you try and make it take the place of facts. And those words up there? They’re the facts.
Here’s what you need to do…
Take a minute or two or ten or whatever to go and re-read all those word thingies I left up there on the page. Do that until they sink in. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with re-reading something in order to have it sink in. In fact, taking the time to understand something is just plain smart. Anyway, when it all clicks—and it will—you’ll be happy you took the time.
So how the hell am I supposed to get laid?
Sign up to a legit dating site.
Click here and check out the sites I’ve listed. Sign up to one of those sites and you’ll find loads of women who want to get laid. No bullshit attached. No scams.
TL;DR
MilfAddicts.com? Nope. Scam.
Re milfaddicts.com, what do the initials SM in the status star stand for? Are they real persons? Real members?
Hi John.
Not 100% sure about the “SM”, but if I were to guess, I’d say “Silver Membership”? I didn’t find something that specifically said that’s what the “SM” means.
As far as whether those members are real or not, who knows? Maybe? The question I would ask is, does it matter if they are? The site is still littered with fake profiles.
What I know for sure is that they utilize fictitious profiles, as outlined in their own terms and conditions. To me, that means they don’t have their user’s best interests at heart. It means that they are actively trying to deceive their users. That’s more than enough to send me headed in the opposite direction.