The Question
Gentleman who wants some sensual side time with a mischievous mistress: “Hey Frankie. How do I get laid at EroticAffairs.com?”
Me: “EroticAffairs.com? Easy answer. You just gotta get in the right head space. Picture this… You light some candles and open a nice bottle of wine. Head over to the stereo and turn on some smooth jazz. You look in the mirror and straighten that collar. Game is tight. The doorbell rings. Ohhh yeah. It’s time. You slowly swing the door open, and standing right there in front of you, wrapped in nothing but a raincoat, is a curvy dish of you fucking don’t!”
In other words, you’re living in a pure fantasy if you think you’re getting laid at EroticAffairs.com.
But why, Frankie? What’s wrong with EroticAffairs.com?
Welcome to the Bullshit Games! Where the odds are never in your favor!
You can’t win against fake members, fake profiles, and fake emails.
All three of which you’ll be competing against at EroticAffairs.
Tell me more, Frankie.
Sure thing!
This time, the scam factory is using “Online Legates” to fuck with people.
But I want details!
Ask and ye shall receive!
I tell people this same thing every single time, but here it is again for all you noobs out there:
If you don’t wanna get burned, read the freaking Terms and Conditions on a site.
That said, why don’t we check out the T&C from EroticAffairs?
Here’s the first thing you see when you get to section 14:
ONLINE LEGATES: EROTICAFFAIRS.COM UTILIZES VIRTUAL PROFILES THAT DO NOT CORRESPOND TO ACTUAL MEMBERS
Well now, that doesn’t sound so good, does it?
How about this bit from section 14.2:
An ONLINE LEGATE may be a digital actor, an avatar or a synthespian (e.g. a computer generated “person” or “character”). ONLINE LEGATES may be employed by eroticaffairs.com or a third party to enhance Your online experience.
Umm, yeah. Wow.
There’s more blah about their “Online Legate” services, of course. Feel free to read ahead. What it comes down to though, is this: More legal mumbo-jumbo to cover their asses, while you get yours kicked.
I don’t believe you, Frankie!
Let’s ask Karl what he thinks about you not believing me. Karl?
My thoughts, exactly.
“Virtual profiles”, fellas. As in, “not physically existing” profiles. That’s what we were talking about a second ago. Because, you know, that’s what it says in the terms for their site.
But, if you’re still interested in defying logic, maybe you can get yourself a virtual date?
So how the hell am I supposed to get laid?
Sign up to a legit dating site.
Click here and check out the sites I’ve listed. Sign up to one of those sites and you’ll find loads of women who want to get laid. No bullshit attached. No scams.
TL;DR
EroticAffairs.com? Nope. Scam.
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