The Question
Mystery man who wants some uncomplicated sexy times with a fun-loving female: “Hey Frankie. How do I get laid at NoStringsFun.com?”
Me: “NoStringsFun.com? Well, some might say you can do that with… no strings attached! See what I did there? Huh? Did you? No “strings” attached. Hooboy. Good comedy. Right. Anyway… you fucking don’t!”
Unless your idea of fun is getting strung along (oh man, I’m on a roll) by imaginary women, there’s no fun to be had at NoStringsFun.com.
But why, Frankie? What’s wrong with NoStringsFun.com?
As equally in your face as things in the third dimension (otherwise known as 3D), I present to you a term (that may or may not stick around) for my usual discovery with sites of this ilk: 3F.
What, pray tell, is 3F you ask?
3F is short for the three Fs that always seem to turn up with these types of scamboozlers:
Fake members. Fake profiles. Fake emails.
Count ‘em. 1-2-3 Fs
So, what’s wrong with NoStringsFun.com? Simple. That shit is 3F.
Tell me more, Frankie.
Okay!
Looks like we have another sparkle sprinkler here boys!
But I want details!
Understandable. I suppose “sparkle sprinkler” wasn’t much to go on. It will be in a minute though.
Let’s refer to the always rootin’-tootin’, straight-shootin’ Terms and Conditions-ootin’. (Yeah, yeah. I’m shaking my own head at that one.)
Section I6 for those playing along at home.
In order to enhance your amusement experience, to stimulate you and others to use our Services more extensively, and to generally sprinkle some sparkle and excitement into the Services of NOSTRINGSFUN.COM, we may post fictitious profiles, generate or respond to communications by means of automated programs or scripts that simulate or attempt to simulate your intercommunication with another real human being (though none really exists and any dialog is generated by programming), and we may employ or contract for the paid services of real persons who may interact with you as part of their compensated employment.
Now you too know the nonsense that is the Sparkle Sprinkler!
I don’t believe you, Frankie!
Sparkle. Sprinkler.
I’m not making this shit up.
But fuck it. What do I know? Maybe you like sparkles.
So how the hell am I supposed to get laid?
Sign up to a legit dating site.
Click here and check out the sites I’ve listed. Sign up to one of those sites and you’ll find loads of women who want to get laid. No bullshit attached. No scams.
TL;DR
NoStringsFun.com? Nope. Scam.
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